OM45GE - Posted - 12/29/2014:  06:26:45

managed to stay together all these years is a puzzlement. 

Neither of them

jistgreg - Posted - 12/29/2014:  09:24:01

has any appeal. 

The judge in the case 

Edited by - jistgreg on 12/29/2014 09:24:55

OM45GE - Posted - 12/29/2014:  10:04:58

had to recuse himself because he had slept with both of them.

He didn't think he  

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/29/2014:  15:38:54

was transgender because sleeping with mice is an old tradition in his family.

But the word got out

OM45GE - Posted - 12/29/2014:  16:10:05

and before you knew it he was known as the mouse copulator.

He wasn't sure if it was

Edited by - OM45GE on 12/29/2014 16:10:14

banjoscotty - Posted - 12/30/2014:  02:34:15

scheduled for Tuesday or Wednesday.

But the Dr's office called him and

OM45GE - Posted - 12/30/2014:  06:49:32

and said they needed to reschedule his appointment.

It seems the doctor had

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/30/2014:  11:07:46

taken his own advice and took 2 aspirins and went to bed,then called his secretary in the morning.

Why these sawbones

jistgreg - Posted - 12/30/2014:  13:39:41

think that aspirin is a panacea is beyond me. 

The Indians (yes, I said Native Americans) made do with willow bark 

MWBailey - Posted - 12/30/2014:  16:59:28

Which really hurt, because willow bark is hard to digest.

Thus the do was

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/30/2014:  22:14:05

actually a re,according to the shut yo' trapp family.

My favourite things

jistgreg - Posted - 12/31/2014:  04:48:03

shouldn't have a "u" in them. 

Why did the Yanks throw off the British shackles -- and spellings -- if the Canucks (yes, I said it -- but I honoured them with a capital C) -- IF they

Edited by - jistgreg on 12/31/2014 04:51:11

OM45GE - Posted - 12/31/2014:  05:19:28

remained part of the Crown and the struggled with a huge Francophone majority smack in the middle of the country.

Ask a Quebecois and

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/31/2014:  09:58:18

they'll just say"Mon Dieu,Monsieur. Shoot the puck,Pierre!"

Pea soup is

OM45GE - Posted - 12/31/2014:  10:14:22

good to eat on a cold winter's afternoon.

However, if you eat too much, you will

MWBailey - Posted - 12/31/2014:  10:49:32

Pucker up and groan.

"Let's dance La Bastringue,"

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/31/2014:  19:41:26

and wear coureurs de bois clothes while floating down the St. Lawrence.

French,a romantic language,

jistgreg - Posted - 12/31/2014:  20:37:32

pronounces "knucklehead" "Un crétin." 

Their view of early 

OM45GE - Posted - 01/01/2015:  13:52:44

European history differs significantly from that of the British.

For one thing,

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/01/2015:  15:36:24

they claim the English Channel was actually named the French "Chanel".

And Big Ben

OM45GE - Posted - 01/01/2015:  17:54:30

was known as le gros horloge.

I don't know why

MWBailey - Posted - 01/01/2015:  20:54:16

They thought it was so gross.

Another mystery is fromage, which

jistgreg - Posted - 01/01/2015:  21:28:14

they say when posing for a photograph, even though it does NOT draw the lips into a smile, as does our "cheese." 

Another thing:  Fromage bleu is not blue cheese, despite 

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/01/2015:  22:23:36

the raconteurs telling us Clouseau blew or cut cheese at the annual photo de familie.

Joliet,a getaway for

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/02/2015:  03:58:36

only $150 per night is very reasonable.

But if your a tight wad,go

jistgreg - Posted - 01/02/2015:  04:50:55

readjust your loader. 

Black powder is often 

OM45GE - Posted - 01/02/2015:  04:57:16

mistaken for licorice crystals with disastrous results.

My cousin

jistgreg - Posted - 01/02/2015:  05:11:29

was the disastrous result of one evening when nothing his parents tried worked. 

He is American, natch, so English playwright Tom Taylor 

OM45GE - Posted - 01/02/2015:  05:19:40

called him "Our American cousin."

He thought that would

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/02/2015:  05:50:18

get his play on Broadway,but alas,these condescending attitudes have a way of riling up the natives.

Paul Revere warned

OM45GE - Posted - 01/02/2015:  11:56:39

that the British were coming but it turned out to be a rumor.

What was really coming was

jistgreg - Posted - 01/02/2015:  13:54:02

the iceman.  

The headline on the review read " 

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/03/2015:  02:17:13

"The Iceman Is Coming"

But the Iceman didn't come either,,it was

OM45GE - Posted - 01/03/2015:  06:56:02

all a publicity stunt put on by the local appliance store.

They had done something similar

jistgreg - Posted - 01/03/2015:  08:29:29

with The Threepenny Opera, but they were losing money on it. 

"Never invest your own money" was 

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/03/2015:  08:31:58

a motto of P.T. Barnum's,thinking there was a sucker born every minute.

In reality,though,

OM45GE - Posted - 01/03/2015:  10:20:06

it wasn't P.T. who said that.

It was

jistgreg - Posted - 01/03/2015:  10:47:42

David Hannum, one of Barnum's rivals. 

A good judge of horseflesh 

Scaggs7 - Posted - 01/03/2015:  17:19:22

is me, because you never thought I could it till i won the Ky derby

If you had a mule like mine you would

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/03/2015:  20:53:48

give up farming,leave the plough in the field,and take a job at the mill in town.

The taverns,however,

jistgreg - Posted - 01/03/2015:  23:20:47

would take all your pay, your girl would run off with somebody else, and don't even ask about the geese. 

I was born in a hollow, or holler, 

banjoscotty - Posted - 01/04/2015:  04:08:32

In southern Ohio named California Holler. (By Cracky)

Yet they call us hillbillys because

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/04/2015:  08:48:57

we know how to pick a banjo,skin a possum, and raise Cain on a Saturday night.

Raisin' Abel

Scaggs7 - Posted - 01/04/2015:  13:42:21

wasn't easy and keeping him out of Paint Creek was even harder

I saw a

jistgreg - Posted - 01/04/2015:  13:52:45

Esau a-sittin' on a see-saw. 

I saw Esau; he saw 

Mountain Dew - Posted - 01/04/2015:  14:10:08

A squirrel swinging in a hammock.

It's odd how...

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/04/2015:  14:12:35

a C-sau, with two Arkansas sawyers peelin' the paint off'en her with them thar fiddles,can incite a riot.



My granpappy 

Edited by - chuckv97 on 01/04/2015 14:13:57

Scaggs7 - Posted - 01/04/2015:  14:15:00

saw Roxy fiddlin at the country fair

that's when I saw

jistgreg - Posted - 01/04/2015:  14:22:42

the light for the first time in my life, and I knew I couldn't go back to my old lyin' ways. 

So now I'm just