Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/04/2022:  08:25:18

-tor’s nurse “Bambi Bust” is a real looker.

I can’t help

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/04/2022:  10:56:45

with your dream to meet her in the back room after the show.

However

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/04/2022:  10:59:20

the back room at Grim Jim’s is filled with empty liquor bottles and old undies.

Maybe Dora’s “Sunset Motel”

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/04/2022:  14:06:53

might be a more appropriate place to go.

I've heard

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/04/2022:  15:23:47

that banjo players who drive Buicks are in high demand in dating circles.

Maybe

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/04/2022:  21:07:19

it’s the chrome wire wheels and banjo flanges that give them goosebumps.

My galpal drove over my

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/05/2022:  07:03:32

banjo and then my foot.

I don’t know

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/05/2022:  14:56:25

what I Should do about it as it was only her first time.

Later she somehow

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/05/2022:  16:03:11

managed to drive over my fiddle, mandolin, and Martin and Gibson guitars which were all lined up in the driveway.

I’m starting to wonder

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/05/2022:  22:53:53

if my mother-in-law keeps putting my axes out on the driveway.

She’s always played the Church organ

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/07/2022:  08:32:09

and loves tickling the ivories.

She has

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/08/2022:  20:42:59

developed a bad case of carpal tunnel syndrome.

Thus, Pastor Parsimonious fired her

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/09/2022:  09:02:47

up by telling her that her daughter, sister, and her mother were good in bed.

This

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/09/2022:  20:55:23

led her to say, “Waddya think I am, chopped liver?!”

So she slapped his face

 

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/10/2022:  05:48:12

and rode off into the sunset with her ripped yoga instructor, never to be seen or heard from again.

It was a sleepy, dusty

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/10/2022:  09:48:50

day in Dodge when Festus got a big thirst on.

He shuffled over to the Long Branch

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/11/2022:  03:25:36

to wet his whistle.

Little did he know

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/11/2022:  14:26:31

that Miss Kitty had cut off his tab and refused service.

That really surprised

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/11/2022:  15:48:21

Sam the tarbender who slipped Festus a shot of rotgut whisky.

Kitty called Matt

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/12/2022:  04:31:15

“Sugar”.

He

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/12/2022:  16:26:17

called “twinkle toes”.

Doc Adams warned those two

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/13/2022:  17:03:55

that the stage was running late.

They

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/13/2022:  17:59:34

interpreted that metaphorically thinking he meant that Kitty was pregnant.

Matt starting sweating

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/14/2022:  06:28:34

.44 caliber bullets.



His first thought

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 12/14/2022 06:29:00

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/14/2022:  14:25:18

was to ride to St. Louis to just get away for a bit.

After all Kitty would

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/14/2022:  18:53:13

be cranky for 9 months and likely start arguments.

Doc told Matt

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/15/2022:  08:52:23

that he should leave considering amount of evidence against him.

Matt then

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/15/2022:  10:23:36

subjected himself to a DNA test which produced startling results.

It seems

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/15/2022:  11:56:26

his DNA was non-existent , leading Doc to label him an alien being.

The Dillons had come from

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/15/2022:  16:45:59

the badlands of North Dakota and not much was known about them at all.

It's been said

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/16/2022:  04:58:25

the Badlands of North and South Dakota were home to a multitude of indigenous tribes.

It’s possible

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/16/2022:  08:56:44

that Matt's family had lived in a teepee for awhile before moving to Kansas.

He also

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/16/2022:  10:37:42

used to say “Kemo Sabay” to no one in particular.

After shooting a buffalo

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/17/2022:  03:27:33

he made sure that no parts of the animal were laid to waste.

His favorite

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/17/2022:  14:28:32

was all the steaks that he had accumulated after field dressing was complete.

Festus showed

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/17/2022:  14:52:42

up with a jug of rotgut whisky he’d bought from Crazy Horse’s nephew.

After a swig

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/17/2022:  15:51:50

of the fire water eyes went bloodshot and ears bled.

Someone

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/21/2022:  15:00:13

yelled for Doc and ran of to find him.

However

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/21/2022:  18:12:31

Doc and the Cheyenne medicine man were comparing notes.

“White man heal with forked forceps”

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/22/2022:  04:06:02

declared Medicine Man who suffered ill effects from a lifetime of smoking wacky-tobbacy in his peace pipe.

It wasn’t long

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/25/2022:  02:00:23

before NellyBelle’s rad overheated.

Pat Brady cussed

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/25/2022:  03:28:53

a blue streak when he spilled his coffee.



It had been

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 12/25/2022 03:30:23

chuckv97 - Posted - 12/25/2022:  14:43:19

ten long years since Mrs. Pat Brady had lit out for Winnemucca with Chief Nockahoma.



Pat had never mastered the art

Edited by - chuckv97 on 12/25/2022 14:43:48

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/26/2022:  16:38:22

rolling a cigarette with one hand and wiping with the other hand while sitting in the outhouse.

Since the age of 9

KyBanjo - Posted - 12/27/2022:  13:44:08

he has tried to master this feat but it always end up the same.

Still,

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 12/27/2022:  15:18:51

quiet, calm, and peaceful was the evening.

Sitting on the porch

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/01/2023:  15:33:25

I heard a spaceship land over in Joe Robinson’s pasture.

Ma ran out

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 01/02/2023:  05:38:52

of sugar and eggs so she sent me to Olson’s Store.

On the way

KyBanjo - Posted - 01/02/2023:  09:15:14

to town I was ambushed by three little green martians.

Luckily I was able