Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  17:08:41

hog in the freezer and grave and biscuits on the table

I saw a strange guy at the

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  17:39:12

women's lingerie counter this afternoon.

He was wearing lipstick

OM45GE - Posted - 02/13/2014:  17:48:22

and nothing else. 

The clerk was quite

kcjc69 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  18:04:56

upset the lipstick was orange. He really thought

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  18:15:41

taken by the way he was wearing his watch and playing with his buttons

There is a storm warning. coming for

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  18:20:45

all areas north of the Equator.

There is a run on extra long tent pegs

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  18:36:11

to be used for the vampire that's roming our area

You on the bus and there was a

kcjc69 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  18:37:39

a zombie attack.

But the warden said

MWBailey - Posted - 02/13/2014:  18:43:38

"My daughter prefers mummies."

The sphinx has a broken nose, so

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  19:12:47

they brought in the stone masons.

First they had to build a Masonic Hall

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  19:42:47

next to the space station and the problems started

The ripstop shirt I ordered came

jistgreg - Posted - 02/13/2014:  20:34:18

rippsed on top. 

My dog's pants, however, 

drew-gurbach - Posted - 02/13/2014:  21:00:53

...have FIVE legs!

I knew a guy in Ft Woth Texas...

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/13/2014:  21:03:50

who unfortunately had only on leg.

He whittled another 

jistgreg - Posted - 02/14/2014:  01:34:40

out of a telephone pole and presented an amusing aspect. 

Speaking of telephones, my maiden aunt 

OM45GE - Posted - 02/14/2014:  02:38:10

one on it.

She was never able to

banjoscotty - Posted - 02/14/2014:  03:23:08

find herself a man.

If you ever fish in Sciota River,don't

OM45GE - Posted - 02/14/2014:  03:29:27

eat the fish near Columbus.

They might be

kcjc69 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  04:00:36

green with envy.

But if you drop a line

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  04:30:49

make sure it is the correct address or I won't get the letter

If to hav never seen Scotty's mules you have

OM45GE - Posted - 02/14/2014:  05:02:05

missed something special.

They are so

BigMonFan - Posted - 02/14/2014:  05:11:39

different from Scotty it's uncanny.

Who would have thought

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  05:20:52

that Scotty moving to Fl. would cause so much commotion

When ice fishing you should not

BigMonFan - Posted - 02/14/2014:  05:24:44

fish from the wrong side of the ice.

Running trap lines is a good

OM45GE - Posted - 02/14/2014:  05:44:26

pastime if you have the time.

However, you should know

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  05:48:50

if you do the pastime thing very little work is required

If you climb high enough you can

OM45GE - Posted - 02/14/2014:  06:02:38

see your house from almost anywhere.

However, you have to be careful

banjoscotty - Posted - 02/14/2014:  06:19:15

and don't go around naked.

When hunting quail,always

drew-gurbach - Posted - 02/14/2014:  08:24:29

Look up!  Thats where they're at, most of the time.

Bring me a great big cup of......

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  08:34:38

steaming quail soup.

It's the best remedy

banjoscotty - Posted - 02/14/2014:  09:21:15

for a hungry person.

RandyZ - Posted - 02/14/2014:  09:47:55

with a beard that drags on the ground

Speaking of spacecraft...once

drew-gurbach - Posted - 02/14/2014:  10:32:18

...upon a time, in a galaxy far far away.

A duck walks into a bar...

RandyZ - Posted - 02/14/2014:  11:01:00

and says: hey, you got my bill?

The bartender says: dont be such a wise....

drew-gurbach - Posted - 02/14/2014:  11:06:13

..quacker!

Hey, I saw jim smith and he was...

jistgreg - Posted - 02/14/2014:  11:12:14

Outstanding in a crowd of John Johnsons. 

Jeremiah Johnson was a mountain  

BigMonFan - Posted - 02/14/2014:  12:13:02

top removal advocate.

His motto was

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  12:36:20

"Blast'em to smithereens".

Who needs mountains 

drew-gurbach - Posted - 02/14/2014:  12:49:02

...when valleys do just as well!

Theres a great big green...

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  12:57:11

eyed thing in my kitchen making breakfast

Please contact the office when

RandyZ - Posted - 02/14/2014:  13:08:06

all of the eggs are gone.

If my cat could talk, she'd probably say:

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  13:14:17

"I hate eggs- glad they're all gone.

Now where's that idiot milkman

Edited by - chuckv97 on 02/14/2014 13:14:46

Scaggs7 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  13:45:30

delivering milk in a donkey cart

Wide field of view is

banjoscotty - Posted - 02/14/2014:  18:13:41

when you see everything to the sides,but nothing straight ahead.

If you pull his chain he'll

chuckv97 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  18:51:35

flush the toilet.

You'd better stand back

kcjc69 - Posted - 02/14/2014:  19:16:51

while I shake the tree.

The squirrel took off like

banjoscotty - Posted - 02/15/2014:  03:21:28

the fastest turtle I've ever seen.

Play these guitar chords as I call them to you and we'll

OM45GE - Posted - 02/15/2014:  05:43:57

have a new top ten hit.

We can split the royalties

banjoscotty - Posted - 02/15/2014:  06:32:04

70% for me,30% for you because I know the chords.

The overhead for this music store