chuckv97 - Posted - 07/05/2022:  18:14:10

show police officers his health records and his elevator shoe.

Most cops tell him to keep his shoe on

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/05/2022:  18:14:32

because they assume his feet stink. 

 

Several years ago 

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 07/05/2022 18:18:49

OM45GE - Posted - 07/06/2022:  02:42:28

I was younger than today.

Time has been

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/06/2022:  06:55:53

ticking me off lately because I’m starting to feel like an old timer.

Only yesterday

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/06/2022:  07:39:01

I fell over getting out of bed.

My balance should return

OM45GE - Posted - 07/06/2022:  13:23:59

if I stop drinking.

Dean Martin used to

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/06/2022:  14:32:38

have a glass of Booze in one hand and a cigarette in the other.

His pal Foster Brooks

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/06/2022:  15:57:34

couldn’t hold a candle to ol’ Dino.

As a matter of fact

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/06/2022:  16:34:04

none of the Rat Pack members could outdo Dean.

His Gold Diggers

OM45GE - Posted - 07/07/2022:  02:44:46

sang and danced their way into the hearts of fans worldwide.

They were

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/07/2022:  06:50:49

unfortunately only after his money.

If it walks like a duck

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/07/2022:  08:48:24

, looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it’s probably a duck.

However, in this day and age

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/07/2022:  09:01:24

many have imitated Chuck Berry and his duck-walk.

Daffy sued for

OM45GE - Posted - 07/07/2022:  16:45:30

custody of Huey, Dewey and Louis.

He claimed they were

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/08/2022:  06:28:06

neglected and would be better off under his wing.

It wasn’t

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/08/2022:  16:43:45

fit for them to watch Donald and Daisy smooching and sparking every evening.

Daffy caught wind of these hijinks

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/08/2022:  18:25:53

and rounded up Goofy and Pluto.

Together

OM45GE - Posted - 07/08/2022:  21:02:32

they tried to come up with a plan to stop Daffy.

Unfortunately,

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/08/2022:  21:04:25

Donald and Daisy ran off to Muncie , Indiana.

There they engaged in romantic bliss

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/09/2022:  01:17:31

until the money ran out.

What happened

OM45GE - Posted - 07/09/2022:  04:07:54

next is a tawdry tale that should serve as a warning to other cartoon characters.

The wayward waterfowl couple

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/09/2022:  15:03:30

ran afoul of the law after posing as welfare applicants.

Ducks Unlimited was contacted by Sgt. Biff Beronski

OM45GE - Posted - 07/09/2022:  18:17:02

to see if any of its member would like to come down and take a few shots at the miscreants.

The organization said

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/10/2022:  12:57:48

they would send their best hunting sniper to make sure the duck’s gooses were cooked.

After

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/10/2022:  13:33:04

D & D caught wind of the plan they hopped a Greyhound ou to Ely, Nevada.

It was there

OM45GE - Posted - 07/11/2022:  03:11:10

that they took up residence at the Big 4 Ranch Brothel.

Daisy

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/11/2022:  07:27:32

Duke shorts are coming back into style.

I really

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/11/2022:  08:13:34

like how they look on me.

I decided to

OM45GE - Posted - 07/11/2022:  17:03:16

wear a pair to the local bluegrass jam.

For some reason

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/12/2022:  12:32:47

another fellow in DD Shorts and a matching man purse took a shining to me.

Maybe

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/12/2022:  13:22:42

I’ll go gender bending for a while and join the women’s Olympic hockey team.

I’m sure they’ll welcome me

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/12/2022:  14:59:53

as a cross dressing, over the hill, banjo playing, team mascot / bus driver.

Or just maybe

OM45GE - Posted - 07/12/2022:  16:20:24

they’ll appreciate my witty repartee and excellent cooking.

I hope

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/12/2022:  18:24:41

the girls/trannies like boiled eggs and toast.

My other cooking skills

OM45GE - Posted - 07/12/2022:  19:03:50

are limited to pouring milk into a bowl of cereal.

Thankfully there are

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/13/2022:  03:22:46

others willing to share their culinary talents.

Unfortunately

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/13/2022:  06:23:32

my keto diet limits my intake of carbs.

I’m turning carnivorous

OM45GE - Posted - 07/13/2022:  14:18:14

but am a little concerned about my cholesterol.

My doctor said

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/13/2022:  17:51:39

I need a vacation of rest and relaxation.

I guess

OM45GE - Posted - 07/13/2022:  18:40:49

he’s probably right but after paying his bill I’m too broke to spend the night.

I tried to explain

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/13/2022:  23:33:53

the fine points of sudoku to him but his eyes began to glaze over.

His favourite pastime

OM45GE - Posted - 07/14/2022:  02:50:27

is relaxing on the deck of his yacht.

I wonder how

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 07/14/2022:  05:49:25

he likes banjo music. 



I'm guessing he probably

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 07/14/2022 05:50:35

OM45GE - Posted - 07/14/2022:  14:50:08

doesn’t share my musical taste.

After all, he

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/14/2022:  19:24:17

grew up in Cleveland where every other house housed an accordion.

He entered the North Ohio Squeezebox Playdowns

OM45GE - Posted - 07/15/2022:  02:34:32

where he didn’t win any prize but did receive an honorary mention.

He was recognized for his

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/15/2022:  08:04:55

resuscitation efforts when many onlookers passed out from “Bellows Syndrome”.

He once diagnosed me

OM45GE - Posted - 07/15/2022:  14:05:29

as being five months pregnant.

When I pointed out that

chuckv97 - Posted - 07/16/2022:  04:32:52

I dont possess a uterus he was dumbfounded.

I’m not sure his credentials