chuckv97 - Posted - 11/16/2020:  20:26:58

“Chief Sargeant Day” , a feeble attempt to bridge the cultural gaps.

Nevertheless, citizens whooped it up

OM45GE - Posted - 11/17/2020:  02:45:23

and talked in a cringeworthy pidgin attempt to speak like a Native American.

I don’t think they understood

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/17/2020:  09:08:30

at the time, that they actually were Native Americans, on vacation in Mexico, trying to speak Spanish.

When the smoke cleared

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/17/2020:  10:05:20

the Indian blankets were scorched beyond recognition.

“Smoke signals be damned”

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/17/2020:  13:44:07

said the Big Chief.

After their vacation they headed back to

OM45GE - Posted - 11/17/2020:  13:52:51

the casino to count the receipts.

They were doing quite

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/17/2020:  14:57:10

well until they realized they were short on funds.

From there it only

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/17/2020:  15:03:28

took 5 days for them to go broke and lock the doors.

Too many chiefs and not enough Indians

OM45GE - Posted - 11/18/2020:  03:32:44

is a common saying but I’m not sure that it makes sense.

After all, the chiefs are Indians too so

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/18/2020:  05:21:10

that must translate to how municipal road repair crews are structured.

It seems like one guy does the all work

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/18/2020:  05:34:42

and five others lean on their shovels.

I used to work

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/18/2020:  10:11:52

for the state we did plenty of that.

Shovel techniques were taught the first week along with

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/18/2020:  11:12:20

the fine art of wearing a yellow conspicuous vest in a classy, yet functional fashion.



Supervisor class was

Edited by - Pick-A-Lick on 11/18/2020 11:13:02

Peter Vipulis - Posted - 11/18/2020:  18:38:36

learning how to fill out direct deposit forms accurately.

From there the conversation

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/18/2020:  18:48:30

drifted into the quality of Alberta bitumen and the price of tea in China.

Most ditch diggers have high IQ’s

OM45GE - Posted - 11/19/2020:  03:13:55

but are rarely tested.

It’s probably because

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/19/2020:  11:31:18

the tests are in high demand and there is a limited quantity available.

This year both of the available tests

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/19/2020:  15:33:03

were taken by Leavenworth releasees.



Cops called them “wise guys”

Edited by - chuckv97 on 11/19/2020 15:33:21

OM45GE - Posted - 11/20/2020:  03:19:24

often while mimicking The Three Stooges.

That inevitably leads to

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/20/2020:  04:12:48

someone yelling in a high voice “Hey, Moe! Yuk, Yuk, Yuk”

Then another guy

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/20/2020:  11:58:30

known as Shemp showed up.

From that point it

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/20/2020:  12:40:40

was downhill for the Stooges.

Curly was the

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/20/2020:  13:31:24

the funniest stooge and believed to be the people’s favorite.

Moe and Larry

OM45GE - Posted - 11/21/2020:  05:05:09

had an odd, hostile yet symbiotic relationship.

They were

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/21/2020:  07:41:34

great at developing money making schemes.

One time

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/21/2020:  09:30:16

they started a polka band without accordions.

The hecklers

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/22/2020:  09:02:08

started harassing the band.

From there it only

OM45GE - Posted - 11/22/2020:  10:09:40

served to prove the old adage that everyone is a critic.

Of course, opinions are like

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/22/2020:  10:11:55

rectal orifices - everybody’s got one.

Speaking of which, my outhouse

OM45GE - Posted - 11/22/2020:  10:20:52

has been treated to a fresh coat of paint.

We chose a lovely shade of

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/22/2020:  13:40:51

lavender.

As it seems to

OM45GE - Posted - 11/23/2020:  03:30:33

lend a certain peaceful ambiance to our visits.

Now all we need are some

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/23/2020:  05:52:57

old Sears and Montgomery Wards catalogs to complete the vintage vibe.

We could also add

OM45GE - Posted - 11/23/2020:  06:25:35

a hornet nest in the rafters to create a sense of urgency.

I was once stung on my

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/23/2020:  07:57:07

golden birthday while playing a Kazoo and hopping on one foot while blindfolded.

One of my birthday presents

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/23/2020:  08:07:04

was a first aid kit that was very handy.

You see as a kid I

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/23/2020:  09:07:59

was rather oafish and clumsy.

They called me an accident waiting to happen

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/23/2020:  12:26:40

after learning that my father called me the accident that did happen.

My first clue was that I’m named “Oooops”

OM45GE - Posted - 11/24/2020:  04:10:26

but for some reason I never put two and two together.

My parents seemed quite amused by my

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/24/2020:  07:03:08

physical resemblance to our mailman.

My red hair

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/24/2020:  08:13:44

and pale skin really stood out.

I was the subject of several

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/24/2020:  08:30:34

dog attacks on my paper route,,,or rather my flyer delivery job.

Scars, to me, are a badge of hono(u)r

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/24/2020:  09:26:07

to be proudly displayed to all that are daring enough to doggedly appreciate another’s misfortune.

One scar is in the shape of

OM45GE - Posted - 11/24/2020:  11:54:53

a crescent moon.

It would look good

KyBanjo - Posted - 11/24/2020:  14:12:23

if I could only get it tattooed in to something else.

The tattooist seemed to think

Pick-A-Lick - Posted - 11/24/2020:  15:53:27

that he could tattoo an outhouse around the crescent moon scar, which I think would look very macho and sexy.

I’ll bet the ladies

OM45GE - Posted - 11/25/2020:  03:55:30

would like it too.

Especially if he included

chuckv97 - Posted - 11/25/2020:  04:51:17

a phallus-shaped door handle.

Never underestimate

Edited by - chuckv97 on 11/25/2020 04:52:17

OM45GE - Posted - 11/25/2020:  05:28:01

the allure of phallic symbols.

Especially when