stanleytone - Posted - 09/03/2020:  08:34:59

Mr Bean comes to me for inspiration

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/03/2020:  08:43:12

Ordered left-handed barbells from Rocky’s Gym Supply

OM45GE - Posted - 09/03/2020:  17:29:54

saga of the last donut

stanleytone - Posted - 09/06/2020:  06:02:26

Had to knock out those bottom teeth to make room for my tongue

Omeboy - Posted - 09/06/2020:  12:30:47

What do you call a beautiful woman on this guy's arm?

..................................................................................................................................A tattoo.

Edited by - Omeboy on 09/06/2020 12:31:18

TheLastWord - Posted - 09/06/2020:  15:49:24

Can't stop licking the neighbors cats.

rob_jenny - Posted - 09/06/2020:  15:50:55

thats disssspicable!!

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/06/2020:  16:13:23

Flatulates bass in the local canine choir

geoB - Posted - 09/06/2020:  16:27:13

radical prominently posts "SG"playing avatar on prominent banjo hangout website

OM45GE - Posted - 09/07/2020:  04:04:55

It ain’t easy being green

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/10/2020:  11:42:42

It ain’t easy being chronically constipated

OM45GE - Posted - 09/10/2020:  12:14:08

Never going to have the show down before opening night

Omeboy - Posted - 09/10/2020:  17:23:50

He's spent the last two weeks studying for his saliva test.

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/10/2020:  20:44:46

Often has Pluto over for milk bones and kibbles

OM45GE - Posted - 09/11/2020:  04:04:50

The wedding band discovers the open bar at the reception

Omeboy - Posted - 09/11/2020:  16:41:09

Right now he's trying to tell the difference between a "stroke of genius" and just a regular stroke.

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/11/2020:  17:26:43

Was once recruited by the Beagle Boys as a runner but got the heave-ho for stopping at too many fire hydrants.

OM45GE - Posted - 09/12/2020:  04:18:50

There will be lots of regrets in the morning

TheLastWord - Posted - 09/12/2020:  04:44:57

Eagerly waiting for Omeboy and Chuck97 to bring dinner.

OM45GE - Posted - 09/12/2020:  04:51:58

Only he and The Shadow know and he’s not telling

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/12/2020:  06:21:27

Often shops for socks that fit his hands

OM45GE - Posted - 09/12/2020:  09:48:27

When hockey players form an orchestra

Omeboy - Posted - 09/12/2020:  10:00:58

He met his girlfriend thru a new dating service------exclusively for lonely ventriloquist dummies.

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/12/2020:  12:05:01

Called his b**** friend a Tramp and ended up in the doghouse

OM45GE - Posted - 09/13/2020:  06:02:41

This orchestra is going to the dogs

Omeboy - Posted - 09/13/2020:  06:37:30

He had that terrible nightmare again---where his ventriloquist boss shoves him into a wood-chipper feet first.

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/13/2020:  08:33:48

Chip’N’Dale tease the hell out of him when he’s tied up at his doghouse

Edited by - chuckv97 on 09/13/2020 08:34:15

OM45GE - Posted - 09/13/2020:  11:18:05

They heard Seji Ozawa was signing autographs backstage

Omeboy - Posted - 09/13/2020:  11:24:18

He had that OTHER terrible nightmare again---where his ventriloquist boss sells him to a paper company ---- and they make him into several dozen political campaign signs.

OM45GE - Posted - 09/14/2020:  04:04:40

Took going to the dogs a little bit too far

Omeboy - Posted - 09/14/2020:  19:49:44

Still has high hopes of becoming the first hand-puppet White House correspondent.

OM45GE - Posted - 09/15/2020:  04:04:40

Laughs at all obedience training attempts

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/15/2020:  06:57:06

Got kicked out of the PlayDough Club

OM45GE - Posted - 09/15/2020:  07:01:17

College sociology experiment gone horribly wrong

Omeboy - Posted - 09/15/2020:  10:12:21

All the studios in Hollywood rejected his latest movie script. He called it "The Fat And The Furious".

OM45GE - Posted - 09/15/2020:  10:23:06

Knows how to talk but doesn’t have anything to say

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/15/2020:  11:17:25

Was stripped of his accountant’s licence for refusing to wear a green visor.

OM45GE - Posted - 09/16/2020:  04:00:10

We found this picture in the dictionary next to the entry for dissonance

Omeboy - Posted - 09/16/2020:  08:17:34

After a nice phone call from Elon Musk, he's now looking forward to being the first ventriloquist dummy on the moon.

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/16/2020:  08:32:20

Often moons passing cats

OM45GE - Posted - 09/16/2020:  08:36:46

The group's workers compensation insurance premiums are getting excessive

Omeboy - Posted - 09/16/2020:  08:54:22

After getting an opinion from each one of his toes, he's finally decided to see a psychiatrist.

OM45GE - Posted - 09/16/2020:  11:36:46

Had a brief career as a therapy dog that did not end well

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/16/2020:  12:14:07

Suffers daily from plantar fasciitis

OM45GE - Posted - 09/16/2020:  17:22:59

Their suffering appears to be universal

Omeboy - Posted - 09/16/2020:  18:54:56

His parents are so proud!!! He's the subject of a new scientific paper: "Cognition In Brainless Organisms."

chuckv97 - Posted - 09/16/2020:  20:26:13

When he was 5 days old his daddy ran off with “Fluffy”, the promiscuous poodle down the street.

OM45GE - Posted - 09/17/2020:  04:17:14

Misunderstanding about the meaning of “flash mob”

Omeboy - Posted - 09/17/2020:  10:12:53

On his very first date, the girl had to slap him three times as hard as she could. No, he wasn't getting "fresh"-------------she thought he was dead!!!