chuckv97 - Posted - 01/05/2020:  15:24:28

Taught Buck Cherry the “duck walk”

OM45GE - Posted - 01/06/2020:  03:06:28

Taught Jack Kerouac about life on the road

TheLastWord - Posted - 01/07/2020:  12:35:37

Never got past first base.

Omeboy - Posted - 01/07/2020:  13:30:16

Once at a Hollywood cocktail party, he once told the Mummy he was wrapped way too tight.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/07/2020:  13:39:14

Hasn’t been invited to any Hollywood parties

Omeboy - Posted - 01/07/2020:  13:56:59

Occasionally throws a "pity party" and only invites himself.

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/07/2020:  14:57:05

Got thrown out of the Mickey Mouse Club for drooling

OM45GE - Posted - 01/07/2020:  17:13:19

Has been thrown out of more boxcars than he can count

Omeboy - Posted - 01/07/2020:  18:17:02

The only guy who ever threw up after the tea-cup ride at Disneyland.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/08/2020:  10:53:31

Was perfectly comfortable with his own ears

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/08/2020:  11:19:42

Has trouble tying a Windsor knot

OM45GE - Posted - 01/08/2020:  15:01:41

Retired railroad engineer too proud to ride inside

Omeboy - Posted - 01/08/2020:  15:11:34

In high school, he was voted the "least likely to ever to start a biker bar brawl."

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/08/2020:  16:24:04

Never got over the hazing at the Police Academy’s Canine Training School.

Omeboy - Posted - 01/08/2020:  17:20:42

Has big hopes to get back into the outhouse-restaurant business.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/09/2020:  03:00:49

Resents being called “Rat Dog”

Omeboy - Posted - 01/09/2020:  18:06:42

Really resents being forced to take a breathalyzer test.

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/09/2020:  19:38:22

Has breath that will stop a freight train.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/10/2020:  02:47:20

Happy that the freight train stopped

Omeboy - Posted - 01/10/2020:  21:11:29

Thought he recognized a blurry image of his dad on a recent episode of "The Unexplained Files."

OM45GE - Posted - 01/11/2020:  03:27:12

Wouldn’t mind the silly ears so much if his owner hadn’t attached them with a stapler

Omeboy - Posted - 01/11/2020:  09:27:44

Man! You talk about a faulty hernia mesh-----his worked its way up around his neck!

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/11/2020:  09:55:42

Used to carry rotgut rum in a small barrel around his neck.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/11/2020:  17:30:12

Carrying rotgut rum in a bag slung over his shoulder

Omeboy - Posted - 01/11/2020:  17:52:23

There's bad news and good news. The bad news is: his hernia mesh failed. The good news is: he made a shirt collar out of it.

Edited by - Omeboy on 01/11/2020 17:54:12

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/11/2020:  18:52:57

The good news is that Minnie Mouse fluttered her eyelashes at him.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/11/2020:  19:03:24

There’s lots of good news but you probably wouldn’t understand

TheLastWord - Posted - 01/12/2020:  04:10:25

Can't locate his Depends diaper stash.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/12/2020:  05:46:53

Has never seen a duck wearing Depends

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/12/2020:  13:45:43

Often has to duck into back alleys to avoid stares

OM45GE - Posted - 01/13/2020:  03:37:04

Has to duck and hide when the railroad bulls come around

TheLastWord - Posted - 01/14/2020:  03:42:39

Likes to pretend he's wearing Depends while defending the castle.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/14/2020:  03:44:28

Looking forward to the snowbirds heading back north.

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/14/2020:  09:34:38

Told Henry Hudson he wasn’t going with him to look for the northwest passage

OM45GE - Posted - 01/14/2020:  14:02:13

Told his wife he was going out for milk

Omeboy - Posted - 01/14/2020:  17:05:48

Shows up once a year at the local writers club to provide some comic relief.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/15/2020:  03:32:52

Doesn’t even watch Disney shows

Omeboy - Posted - 01/15/2020:  10:59:37

Once picketed and boycotted Disney because they wouldn't let skinny old white men audition for the role of "Tinkerbell."

OM45GE - Posted - 01/15/2020:  11:39:58

He thought he had it bad with the mouse ears...

TheLastWord - Posted - 01/15/2020:  15:22:03

Invented Poop Finder Shoes.

Omeboy - Posted - 01/15/2020:  16:58:48

Made the cover of "WhatTheDuck" magazine when it was discovered he was the only water-fowl to ever test positive for rabies.

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/15/2020:  17:12:25

Has trouble finding his Gravy Train bowl

Omeboy - Posted - 01/15/2020:  20:34:23

Above is the advertising photo for Chuck's new "Train Delivered Pizza."

"If it's not there in three days-----it's absolutely free!"

Edited by - Omeboy on 01/15/2020 20:35:28

OM45GE - Posted - 01/16/2020:  03:19:11

Fedora Fido

chuckv97 - Posted - 01/16/2020:  11:01:29

Frilly Freddie

OM45GE - Posted - 01/16/2020:  17:00:53

Boxcar Chuck

Omeboy - Posted - 01/16/2020:  17:32:39

Multiple Choice Quiz:
Our hero above first uttered the phrase, "Out damned spot!!!" when which one of these things happened?
A. He unthinkingly scratched his forehead with a Magic Marker.
B. He was trying to get chocolate pudding out of his chin whiskers.
C. His little schnauzer pooped on his new carpet.

OM45GE - Posted - 01/16/2020:  18:54:28

Has never pooped on the carpet

Omeboy - Posted - 01/17/2020:  13:28:18

You'd never know it to look at him, but he's a part of a highly trained crack-team that (on a moment's notice) can go anywhere in the world and set up a fully functional, fully operational "Hello Kitty" display.