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Mimspicker |
Days, Weeks, or Months? How much time does a person really have to live, especially when the Doctors as using these terms.
This my be the most disturbing question I am having to deal with right now!
Sitting in the emergency room is never any fun. Especially on this date and at this time. (12/28) The Doctor already new I was coming in and immediately went to work on me once I arrived. He was concerned for me and my health and my family. He has been walking through this ordeal with me the past (+/-) two years.
He had a simple observation…The measure of a man is not only how he lives life but also how he approaches death. He said I had succeeded in both. I hope to think so. I know I am approaching death. Some days it seems a little faster than others, but nevertheless, still getting there…. as we all are.
Many of you have been reading the blogs and would encourage to go back and read through them again…my hope is that the message was clear even though my typing has gotten somewhat a mess and It may sound as if I am rambling, but I hope to pull it all together.
Having cancer has not been easy. Living with it each day, the way it gradually takes over, little by little…it does sound somewhat creepy but that is what it does. So I’m here with stage IV cancer, what do I do next. My answer is to continue to live the life God gave to me and intended on me living.
My last blog ended December 23rd, just before Christmas. And I want to brig you up to date as what is going on. He news is really not good. I have several tumors that continue to grow. They do cause some extreme pain which, at times makes it difficult to function. Even the current treatment of chemo had no effect on the tumors. In fact they grew right up and over and chemo treatments I was having.
Unfortunately this has put me into another category. Hospice. What a great organization. They have transferred all my primary care to them and they have been great work with, doctors, nurses and health care aids, all there to help me! I know it sounds selfish, but I like having the extra care. They say there is no real time frame for Hospice, but the six month thing seems to be pretty accurate.
Am I down to my last few months…if my body is telling me anything, I say yes. The signs are there, I continue to lose weight, my appetite is poor. I also have lost a lot of muscle control and strength.
I have been blessed to continue on for another year. I should not have made it another year. However God saw a plan, to keep me here, tell the ones I love that I love them. A chance to say good bye when all else has failed, but mot of all share the good news of Jesus Christ. God cares for me so much he gave his Son for me.
That is just awesome. I continue to be blessed through this sickness. I know God is going to heal me, pay my bills and watch out for me and my family. How much more can a person ask for?
I know I’ll have another blog soon, at least I hope I will!!!!!
…. but maybe I can just add to this one just as easy. I spent the majority of the night last night (1/31/09) in the ER. I have fallen for the second time in a couple of weeks. Falls are one of the hazards and of course broken bones. Scans showed no fractures so that is a good thing. I’m just hurting all over. May take a couple of weeks of my behavin’ to get over this soreness
Until then I must still ponder the question…. I sure want to stick around as long as possible.
Warmest Regards,
Bill
