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The Hardest Thing...

Posted by Mimspicker on Monday, May 26, 2008

Living with cancer is not the easiest thing I have ever dealt with.  I continue on everyday trying to live my life as if I am cancer free and healthy.  Only one difference, I try to stop and smell the roses, so to speak.  I try paying attention to the little things around me.

I know the cancer I have is not curable, at least not by today's medical standards.  Going on 55 and I was looking forward to the best years of my life, I now look forward to good days sometimes.  To look at me you may never know I am sick or was sick.  That's one of the things that is so hard right now.

I have been meeting with a close friend for the past 13 -14 years every Saturday morning.  Prayer, encouragement, problems, he has been a real friend.  We have leaned on each other for counsel and advice, venting and griping, and bring up kids...and almost everything else in between...

Last week I sat with my wife.  A few months ago she had made a list of things "to do" should something happen to me.  I really have been avoiding the subject, mostly because I just don't want to have to deal with it.  But that's not fair to her.  So as we sat, I told her who I wanted to speak at my service.  One being my long time friend.  I asked him this past was kinda quiet, then we moved on to another subject.

I hope we don't have to implement my wishes for many, many years, but for right now the plans have got to be made...and that is about the hardest thing I can think of having to do...

6 comments on “The Hardest Thing...”

BryanWB Says:
Monday, May 26, 2008 @10:23:02 AM

It's a brave thing to have to face Bill, and I - and I'm sure all the guys and gals on here - are with you. God bless, and please don't stop writing on here. Bryan.

Mimosa Banjo Says:
Monday, May 26, 2008 @11:32:46 AM

Bill, You will continue to be in my prayers. Even though you have mentioned that your cancer is not curable and though you are working on that 'to do" list,  I hope that you will be around a long time and continue to have many many good days (years?) to "smell the roses" and share good times with friends and family. -Charis

BanjoDiva Says:
Monday, May 26, 2008 @12:00:04 PM

Bill, remember my directive -- You don't get to leave us until the Diva okays it.  So just get used to the idea that you are going to be around awhile.

By the way, my grandmother and dad tried to have the same conversation with my grandfather regarding "final arrangements". When my grandmother asked him what he would like, he said "surprise me."  :-)

Joanchek Says:
Monday, May 26, 2008 @5:09:56 PM

Bill, taking care of details now is just another way of loving your family.  Hopefully they won't need to open that envelope for many many years, but when they do, you'll have lifted one more responsibility from their shoulders.

Grab every day with both hands, and laugh out loud as often as you can.  Joy is powerful stuff.  I wish you more good days than bad, and many many of them.  Best wishes to you, and yours.

twayneking Says:
Monday, May 26, 2008 @8:38:50 PM

I work with folks making preparations like you are.  Write your story my friend.  Leave it behind as a gift to those who follow on behind you so they know who your are and what you believed.  If you need any help, drop me a note and I give you some pointers. I'm an occasional personal historian and I have some materials that will help you.

Be strong my friend.  God knows where you are and he's standing by when you need Him!


banjomomof7 Says:
Tuesday, June 3, 2008 @8:52:20 PM

My dad was a preacher as I grew up. I will never forget a commet he made to me at the young age of 19. Leave a journal of your wishes. I knew what he ment because he was taking me to the funeral of a friend of mine. He then said.. Not sure I could plan yours, and you will have to do your moms.  So I admire you for setting grounds to make it easier for those around you who love you. Who knows you may out live us all. Your in my prayers.

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