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grandpa j - Posted - 02/03/2011: 16:27:01
How do you deal with the jitters when playing in front of others. When i practice at home i am relaxed and smooth but when i play for someone i get nervous and tense. I miss stings with my right hand and fumble chords with my left. The harder I try the worse it gets. HELP! I dont want to become a closet picker.
Brian T - Posted - 02/03/2011: 16:29:59
Take an empty beer bottle, popular brand. 1/2 full of water. Have a big swig = pretend. Play.
minstrelmike - Posted - 02/03/2011: 16:40:07
Play more often and just get used to covering up the mistakes you make (kind of like in the rest of life).
Practice hard stuff at home and play a lot easier stuff in front of others.
Play for children to get used to playing for audiences you aren't so scared of (and know you can 'get away' with doing simpler stuff).
Relax. Use potions or whatever works.
Va Picker - Posted - 02/03/2011: 16:43:06
I would suggest going to a jam, sit off to the side but somewhat close to the other pickers, tell them you don't want any breaks & just relax & play with the others. Once you see that not many are paying attention to your playing, it'll be (almost) like playing by yourself. Do this a time or two & see if it helps your fears.
kevin0461 - Posted - 02/03/2011: 17:07:26
I had the same problem... the key to overcoming nervousness is practice practice practice. Once muscle memory takes over, it dissipates drastically.
figmo59 - Posted - 02/03/2011: 17:08:36
learn to play with your eyes closed....it helps
chickenwing - Posted - 02/03/2011: 17:14:31
quote:
Originally posted by minstrelmike
Play more often and just get used to covering up the mistakes you make (kind of like in the rest of life)
i dont know the answer
i do the same thing. i can play around familar people but when i feel like they are watching me my fingers get all tangled up
i think the only way to get past it is to play in front of people as much as you can
Lou Bourbon - Posted - 02/03/2011: 17:39:11
I think you are supposed to imagine your audience in their underwear...or yourself in your underwear...I can't remember which. Whatever works for you.
Lou
minstrelmike - Posted - 02/03/2011: 17:44:01
quote:
Originally posted by Lou Bourbon
I think you are supposed to imagine your audience in their underwear...or yourself in your underwear...
That stuff always makes me
more excited. Either way. I think the advice of telling a joke to get started works not because it relaxes the audience, it works because it relaxes the performer.
The 9 pages of comments on the article listed above are well worth reading.
John Estep - Posted - 02/03/2011: 18:13:58
all i can say is just keep doing it ...it gets easier are it has for me.
Ira Gitlin - Posted - 02/03/2011: 18:37:45
quote:
Originally posted by Lou Bourbon
I think you are supposed to imagine your audience in their underwear
That's only good if you get to assign who sits in the front row.
minstrelmike - Posted - 02/03/2011: 18:59:05
quote:
Originally posted by Ira Gitlin
quote:
Originally posted by Lou Bourbon
I think you are supposed to imagine your audience in their underwear
That's only good if you get to assign who sits in the front row.
Absolutely. Someone like Obama--or anybody for that matter--addressing the U.S. Senate might not want that sort of picture in his mind. The Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders, that's a whole 'nother story (Of course, they're already in their underwear).
eagleisland - Posted - 02/03/2011: 19:49:00
Frankly, the answer boils down to this: thicker skin. You're gonna make mistakes. Learn to live with it.
People want you to sound good - in fact, enough of 'em do that most won't even notice your mistakes unless you make a point of letting 'em know you made one. And if you get them into what you're doing, they won't care anyway.
I play in front of other people a lot - students, and audiences with my band. Never made it through one session flawlessly - often, a whole lot of mistakes.
We're human. No one else is perfect, and they shouldn't expect perfection of us banjo players.
Least of all banjo players.
musicman44 - Posted - 02/03/2011: 20:49:41
I have a similar problem, but only around people I know really well or people that know I can play music. When around complete strangers, like at a gig, it doesn't even phase me. But the minute I'm around my wife, my family, my friends, I goof all over the place.
I guess the best thing to do is to relax. And remember that your biggest critic is yourself. That and the crotchety old man that's been playing banjo for 50 years sitting in the back of the bar just sneering at you. Or maybe that just happens to me. Just kidding... Relax, have fun, and the jitters will pass.
Tom Hanway - Posted - 02/03/2011: 20:57:57
Bottom-line-self-confidence often means feeling fully prepared. Practice. Practice in front of a mirror. Practice in front of your dog. Practice in front of an oncoming freight train, no, run! Then practice!
g3zdm - Posted - 02/04/2011: 04:48:28
See if it helps to try and play in our own BHO Chatroom.
You can choose whether or not to use a webcam (in which case those in the chatroom will see you) ; the only essential to be heard is a microphone.
Audience numbers (those in the chatroom at the time) vary from 1 to 15 - and they are normally very sympathetic.
OldPappy - Posted - 02/04/2011: 05:50:48
I love to sing, but used to be very nervous about singing in front of people I don't know. I have a good enough voice, and sing all the time in front of family, and friends, but just couldn't do it in front of strangers. That started to change when I was at a banjo camp last Fall, and the song we were working on was one of my favorites (Sail Away Ladies).
Other than our instructor (Dwight Diller), I was the only person there who knew all the words of the song, so I was asked to lead the singing.
We were sitting in a big circle, and I was sitting right beside Dwight. I was real nervous, thinking I would be extremely embarrassed if I messed it up.
Sure enough, after getting through the first round, I started singing the next verse at the place. Like I said, I was sitting right there beside Dwight, and without skipping a beat, he just leaned over with a grin and whispered "not yet". It didn't hurt a bit, and from that moment it was just a lot of fun.
A room full of people, smiling real big, playing banjos, and singing.
Isn't that what this is all about anyway ? Music is supposed to be fun, so just lighten up, nobody cares, and most won't notice, if you mess up a little.
That experience opened something up for me, and when the office Christmas party was being planned, one of my buddies asked if I would volunteer to get up on stage with him and six other people to sing. I did not hesitate to say "yes". We did not have time for more than one practice, and harmony was something far out of our reach (we sounded pretty bad), but, even so, we had a great time, and the crowd (about 100 people) cheered, laughed, and clapped their hands.
So, just get those Jitters into a steady rhythm, so maybe they start looking like warm up exercises.
Shake you right hand on purpose until it gets good and loose, then start hitting the strings.
I also like the idea of playing in front of children someone mentioned above.
Kids are not as messed up as we "adults" are, and they know fun when they see it.
Edited by - OldPappy on 02/04/2011 05:58:46
Unplugged - Posted - 02/04/2011: 06:28:51
Lots of good advice here. Keep practicing, prepare, don't give up, keep the fun in it, pick with friendly people, and accept that nervousness is extremely normal when in the "Jest Starting" phase.
And recognize that being able to do it in the coziness of your home does NOT mean that you can expect to nail it at a jam. Think of just getting better than of trying to be perfect. Perfection will come when you are able to stop thinking about perfection and focus more on the sheer joy of doing a good job.
To play this instrument (publicly), you just gotta be willing to take risks! Making mistakes at a jam, I find for myself, is simply a clear signal that I need to work on the song/lick/lyric/whatever more. When I flub, I may grin sheepishly or grimace, but I also file away in my brain what I need to (still) work on.
And there can be a great deal of joy in accepting that kind of challenge. 
archtop717 - Posted - 02/04/2011: 06:56:26
Tom is soooooo correct! Practice a ton. I used to hide behind the Bass player on stage. It always made me feel better to have a warm-up exercise before playing. I used scales, playing them as fast and as clean as I could. I also played the hardest tune I knew and all the rest would seem easier. We all have been there. You will get there as you gain confidence and skills. JAM every chance you get.
Paul R - Posted - 02/04/2011: 07:56:45
Is this playing solo or with accompaniment? There's more pressure playing solo, for sure. But if you know the tune cold, the rewards are enormous, in self-satisfaction and audience reaction.
At our open mic jam, we sometimes really mess up the endings to songs. When that happens, we just look at each other and have a good laugh. A sense of humour is a great asset.
The recurring theme to just keep at it is good advice. Ditto to the three most important elements: practice, practice, practice. Don't over-reach youself (sort of like "don't overdrive your headlights").
Find a situation that's less intimidating. Play with friends. That way you share the pressure, and the interaction with them takes some of your mind away from the audience. Or try some practice on a park bench. You can make all the mistakes you want (it's only practice), and your "audience" is just passing by, "listening-at-a-glance".
And don't be nervous about being nervous.
Stringmeister - Posted - 02/04/2011: 09:36:30
If you're trying to impress your listeners, you most likely wont... If you're not worried about it or at least pretend you're not, you'll likely do much better... You know your material, just let it play and keep your mind totally out of the equation... "Would you be comfortable combing your hair, brushing your teeth or washing your hands in front of these same people? Would you be worried about making a mistake while doing it? Of course not".. Look at your music the same as you look at ordinary, mundane day to day activities.. It's not life or death here...
mikey5string - Posted - 02/04/2011: 09:53:19
i think that you have to accept that you might bomb a few times.
just keep doing it. you will get better.
the audience will not hear the mistakes like you might.
they will however hear you stop and say "sorry" and start again. so try not to do that...
DantheBanjoMan - Posted - 02/04/2011: 10:39:02
You will get used to it and the nervousness will go away, but it will take. Every person is different and for some people it takes longer than others, but eventually you get over it. For one of my band mates it took a couple of years. Performing in front of peopel who are supportives helps a lot. Being prepared helps, too, but there is no magic wand and it might take a while. In the mean time, celebrate the fact that you are a good banjo and that you can play smoothly at home. Some people would do anything to be able to do that.
dflowers - Posted - 02/04/2011: 10:55:46
I know the feeling. I went to a BG festival a couple of months ago. I picked up a banjo being sold by a vendor. I sat down behind the curtain of the vendor. I felt like the whole world was watching and hearing me. I froze up and got cotton mouth. I thought this is the same feeling I used to get when I had to speak to an audience, but worse. I, too, am very comfortable in my house, porch and yard. I have even played at the park and had a great time. But, there was something about playing by myself with two hundred people within ear shot that made me uncomfortable.
tombrien - Posted - 02/04/2011: 14:34:20
I recently made my debut at an open mic night near me. I was so nervous when I started my first song............... that is until I looked out at the audience and noticed that NO ONE was paying the least bit of attention to what I was playing! I was way more relaxed when I realized that all eyes were not focused on me (or ears for that matter). I suppose everyone has to get into a state while they play where they forget about everyone and everything else, and concentrate solely on what they came to do, play the heck outta that banjo! Then you might get their attention, Tom
Paul R - Posted - 02/04/2011: 22:00:31
Back from the open mic jam tonight. A couple of things happened that might help you.
One guy got up for his second "round" (you do two songs the first time around, one each time around after that). He began his song and then blanked out and had to stop. He switched to "Wreck of the Old 97" and tore it up, just did a great job with everyone backing him to the hilt.
When it was my third turn, I was going to do one "You Were on My Mind", corraled June, a really good singer, to try a duet, but backed off before we could get going, and switched to "Railroading on the Great Divide". I just wasn't prepared enough for the former song, but could almost do the latter in my sleep.
Stuff happens. You may ace the first time through and crash and burn the next time. I find that a weak performance can be redeemed next time with preparation and adrenaline in correct proportions. On my second round tonight, I started with a joke, and, when they were still laughing, launched into the song. It works for me. You'll find what works for you. (A joke - that works - tends to get them on your side right away.)
Oh, and the guy who followed me sang a new song he wrote about "The Jam in Sunbury". He got a rousing ovation from both audience and band!
1four5 - Posted - 02/05/2011: 00:59:55
Get yourself a guitar player, work up a set list of songs, and go play at the local rest homes as much as you can. The folks will enjoy the time and music you share with them, and you will learn how to play for people in a very relaxed non threatening environment.
David Cunningham - Posted - 02/05/2011: 02:11:36
I always liked going to sing for the folks in rest homes when I was in high school and college. That's a great idea now that I play banjo.
dflowers - Posted - 02/05/2011: 12:37:02
Heah, Hardrock Kidd. That is it. Nice breakdown analysis of playing by ear. That is how I too think it works. Thanks for sharing.
ineoin - Posted - 02/05/2011: 12:54:48
There is so much to say on this subject. But I think we all play because we have fun doing it. When you play out you are sharing that fun and love of music with others. I had a teacher once that said there are "no mistakes in music, only improvisation". So if something does not quite go as planned just smile have fun and remember that is wahat everybody is there for.
grandpa j - Posted - 02/06/2011: 05:11:59
Thanks everyone for your help. Great feedback that will help myself as well as others i am sure. I have been playing solo, so all eyes are on me. Also I have just started this hobby so I am probably expecting to much too soon. I realize now that I didnt know the songs well enough and when I missed a string or chord I would stop and start over which sounded worse and compounded the problem.
jscourt - Posted - 02/06/2011: 05:52:44
1four5, you got it right. Rest homes offer a double-dip: first, they don't care if you goof up, just delighted that you came and played. Secondly, you get to do a lengthy program in front of people. That helps a great deal. I usually "crash & burn" at least once during a gig.
Pickit in the thicket!!
Banjosnob - Posted - 02/09/2011: 03:07:05
I "crashed and burned" at my recital last year playing "Jerusalem ridge" . I practiced the song for 4 months, and all day prior to the performance. Got up and got that jolt of adrenalin, and my fingers couldn't find the strings. I went home frustrated but continued to play the song this last year. I wish I could get up there now and play it. I "know" it and don't have to think so much.
I am practicing for this year's recital next month. The frustration still is ringing in me from last year, but I will try again. I want to succeed this time and get that "I nailed it" feeling. I will use the mirror and practice until I know it cold. Thanks for all the tips!
Gymbal31 - Posted - 02/09/2011: 06:55:12
quote:
Originally posted by Lou Bourbon
I think you are supposed to imagine your audience in their underwear...or yourself in your underwear...I can't remember which. Whatever works for you.
Lou
Make sure you are only
imagining yourself in your underwear.
I learned that the hard way.
minstrelmike - Posted - 02/09/2011: 07:02:11
For the Jerusalem Ridge player and anyone else doing recital-like performing, practice the song from a cold start every day.
Warming your fingers up and getting ready to do the tune during a practice session isn't what's going to happen at the recital. You can practice in the backroom or whatever but if you have to sit for 10 or 15 minutes, you're starting cold again.
So practice that at home.
The very first thing you do after getting the banjo tuned is play the song ALL THE WAY THRU. If you mess up, keep going. (You'll essentially be practicing recovery techniques). After you're warmed up, work on the hard parts using standard techniques but rehearsal is most useful if it's completely accurate of the upcoming situation.
O.D. - Posted - 02/10/2011: 07:58:49
I dont know.
I agree that practicing and knowing the material is very important,however if you get a bad case of the nerves at show time ,all that goes out the window.
Whats actually occuring is the "fight or fleet" syndrome is kicking in and adrenalin is flowing through your veins and in some folks negatively affects your finger control. at that point all the practice etc wont matter
Several things you can do.
Many musicians at all levels.pro and amatuer resort to booze or illegal drugs.
Keep playing in front of people and hope that cures your nerves
this can go on for years
Many pro players use beta blockers to stop the adrenalin rush. Sometimes use of Beta Blockers can get you over the hump and gain confidence so you wont need them after you get use to playing in front of people
Come to realize that usually the folks in the audience are one of 2 things Musicians and Non musicians.
Non musicians of bluegrass music generaly wont recognize your mistakes due to not being bluegrass smart,or new to the music
And other musicians ,who generaly really dont care about your mistakes and are more concerned about their own ability to play music.
Take your pick, I know what I do and it works for me.
Good luck with a tough issue.
Regards, O.D.
Edited by - O.D. on 02/10/2011 08:00:32
drjohn - Posted - 02/10/2011: 14:39:02
Some great posts here. It's comforting to know so many of us have the same issues with performance anxiety. This is my favorite quote of all, frm the AG link:
"The key is not to chase the butterflies in your stomach away; it is to get them to fly in single file.” 
