Many years ago I knew guy who sang Mountain Dew every couple of weeks to a group of boys at the Salesian Boys' Club at Don Bosco College in Newton, New Jersey. The boys would go berserk every time.
He had one verse that I simply can NOT find on the internet. It's driving me crazy. Maybe one of you knows it?
It starts like this:
My sister Marge is as big as a barge, Weighs about a ton or two,,,
That's as far as I can get.
Anyone?
This is likely not how it goes but I enjoy the challenge and will be adding this to my list of verses for this song. Hope someone finds the one you're looking for.
My sister Marge is as big as a barge, Weighs about a ton or two,
We took her to the doc and we came out in shock,
He said her blood type was Mountain Dew
"Much to our dispare, she broke her rocking chair, just a tipin that good old mtn. Dew."
"Her highbutton shoes resembled canoes. You should see her tip that mtn. Dew"
"Just to slow her down it took the whole town,
when she started in that good ol mtn. Dew."
Whoever wrote "Nellie Cartwright" might have some good (?) ideas. 
Edited by - Owen on 09/14/2026 06:25:30
From my high school days in NYC in the 1970s:
Throw away your pills. It'll cure all your ills,
Be you Christian or Pagan or Jew.
It even tastes nice when it's poured over ice.
It's that good ol' mountain dew.
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