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Trying to scare poor old Mike Gregory

Posted by mike gregory on Monday, January 5, 2009

January 5th, 2009

TO: Prime Financial Credit Union

Board of Directors

FROM: M. Gregory

RE: Scare tactics

Dear Sirs;

Your advertisements remind me that I am one of the owners of this financial institution.

In these financially troubled times, when many financial institutions are apparently failing because they were being run by stupid and/or unethical people, it would be nice to know that the Prime Financial Credit Union is being run by good people.

Today in the mail, I received an envelope from Prime Financial Credit Union, and plainly marked on the outside was the message

re: final notification

In times like these, that’s potentially a heart -stopping moment.

The opening line calls me by name (easily enough done with today’s data manipulation capabilities).

And it tells me that it is “important” for you to “receive the missing information”.

Another potentially heart-stopping moment.

It turns out it’s just some plan to get people to sign up for insurance from the Hartford.

And, cleverly included in the free insurance offer, is language which will authorize somebody to automatically remove money from my account.

As an alleged owner of the Prime Financial Credit Union, may I say that I object strenuously to having my employees try to frighten people into signing away any portion of their money?

Some people use scare tactics because those people are unethical.

Some people use scare tactics because those people are stupid, and it never occurs to them that scare tactics are unethical.

I should like to know if there is a third type of person, who considers scare tactics a perfectly acceptable way to deal with the elderly.

As the alleged owner, I suggest that we include a flyer in next month’s statement, apologizing for the scare tactics. Mr. Koenig, Mr. Pierce, and the name and job title of everyone who voted for the use of that verbiage should be included, so that they may accept the responsibility for their decision.

Or, if you prefer, send me the necessary forms to fill out, so that I may close all my accounts, with no financial penalties accruing to me.


M. Gregory

8 comments on “Trying to scare poor old Mike Gregory”

PruchaLegend Says:
Monday, January 5, 2009 @8:53:11 PM

Yay!! Mike!!

LittleGoomba Says:
Tuesday, January 6, 2009 @5:31:09 AM


Texasbanjo Says:
Tuesday, January 6, 2009 @5:32:57 AM

Sounds like a scam to me!

Johnboy109 Says:
Tuesday, January 6, 2009 @6:02:54 AM

The tactics used today to drum up new business are really aggressive. And I think they're aiming at getting one response in 500 contacts.

BvilleDon Says:
Tuesday, January 6, 2009 @6:13:44 AM

Mike, my memory is not what it used to be. Is the next meeting of the Grey Panther Assault Battalion at your place? Did I end up on the Welcome Wagon or the Armaments committee? I just can't remember stuff likie i used to and i have all this paperwork to fill out and send to Nigeria so i can get a lower credit card rate BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE! Oh! I left the bingo cards under the lazy Susan.

Mike Greylak Says:
Wednesday, January 7, 2009 @3:52:48 AM

Oh that is what that was!! I burned it in the fireplace without opening it.  Mike and I belong to the same c.u.   play banjo, worked the same job and live in the same City. I am Mike too!! 2



JasonL Says:
Thursday, January 8, 2009 @3:34:53 AM

Nice one Mike. There's not a lot of that over here in the UK, and luckily it does get stamped on pretty quickly now - mind you, a few years ago our power companies were moving customers from one provider to another by forging signatures...

david in ky Says:
Friday, January 9, 2009 @8:40:26 AM

I get those from time to time. Makes me mad that they wasted 5 minutes of my life figuring out its a scam. On the bright side, I've won the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes 10 yrs in a row. Got to be some kind of record...

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