Exactly. That's the way it is on any online forum. Even here on the Hangout, which is a remarkably civil place for what it is, there are a few folks who, when I see their threads, I usually don't bother.

to not feel defeated tell them you could win --but don't have time to waste-- then ask them to go ahead go ahead with their rebuttal if it makes them feel good--but you won't be back ==explain nobody is wrong just a bad mesh of personalities

Joe, there are three people on here that I won't even acknowledge anymore. I have had rounds with them in the past for exactly the same reasons you mentioned. I have a good amount of knowledge regarding banjos, but I can make mistakes. When someone wants to make me look like a fool to make themselves look more important, I have no more to do with them. I even asked one member to not reply to any of my posts in the future. Sometimes, I have to step back and stay off the forum for a few weeks while things cool down.

I have learned to stay out of trouble by not making definitive statements. Every point I make is just a suggestion; people can take it or leave it. And yeah, there will always be some posters that you find annoying. Really, the only power we have is to ignore them. But if enough people do that, it does add up to some kind of penalty.

I had one guy on here that was asking for the value of banjos that he supposedly had when they were up for bid on auction sites.

Another guy tried to tell me I was wrong about something I experienced when he did not know me and had not seen what I had seen. I knew I was correct, but I didn't argue with that know-it-all. I might have asked him for the winning lottery numbers though.

Agree with all above
Just ignore
For me it’s not as bad as it used to be, I walked away for a long time , they are thankfully gone

There’s still a few but don’t post as much, so I don’t bother

Many sites feature an ignore button. I use it from time to time. You never see their posts again, unless somebody quotes them.

Otherwise, I use my internal "ignore" button.

Everybody here is a know it all. However there is a pecking order. You just got to learn to live with it.

Not much you can do with the know it alls unless they break rules by flaming another member. Then the mods can step in and suggest the flaming stop. If it doesn't, the member can be given a time out and if it keeps happening, a permanent lock. It very seldom comes to the latter, but sometimes take a few lock outs to convince them they really need to follow rules.

Otherwise, I read, remember and check back to see if it's getting to the point we need to step in.

I will give my opinion, but it's not usually anything someone can challenge since I usually give reasons for what I think by what's happened to me in the past. I try not to argue with any member, just remind them of the rules.

Like many forums there are some that think their opinions carry the same weight as facts. In those cases, it is best to just ignore them and not respond. There have been some great discussions on here where members have a difference of opinion and can discuss them in a civil manner and in other cases it got quite snarky. Our moderators do a great job of staying on top of all discussions and strike pretty quickly when things get a little too rough!

We're all guests here onthe Hangout and, like out parents told us, we need to behave. If some don't then it's up to the mods to step in when they figure it's needed.

If there's something that doesn't feel correct to you then remind yourself that you're only a guest. It's been working pretty good for all these years

Joe, I know the poster you’re referring to, although there are others.
Some folks are unhappy or looking to pick a fight,, pray for the s.o.b. that he’ll find peace of mind.
There is a member here who can get under my skin for posting tabs of a tune others have just posted, as if it’s treading on his exclusive territory, fcol.
Some banjo pros on Facebook were griping about it a while ago,,, they don’t visit here anymore.

I know who you are talking about also, and there's no rule broken and nothing wrong with posting another version of a song someone else has tabbed out. It gives members more than one choice of how to play it.

If the pros get their feelings hurt because of that, then they're more than welcome to come back or stay away. We hate to lose members, but if they can't go with the flow, then they probably need to go back to Facebook where they're not bothered by someone else posting tabs.

Sherry, I understand your position,,,, taht it’s no rule broken.
I’m posting this publicly instead of privately because I think it’s rude, childish, and tacky. I’ve had a quarrel with this person in the past,, then we agreed to drop it. However, the other issue is his piling on his tabs multiple times in a day to bury other members’ tabs - ridiculous.
Thanks for letting me air my grievances. (I ask no one to agree)

This forum is a great resource to those of us who love the banjo.
My 2 cents worth is that online conversations afford us the opportunity to be rude.

It seems if we are not face to face, discussing something we actually agree a lot about, it leaves us finding it easier to be unkind in comments.
Years ago, I realized I could almost unconsciously be snarky when posting online.
So, I stop and think about what I say and how I say it. It is never too late to behave.

It does sadden me to think of the folks on the BH that have dropped out because of this issue.
Anyone who gets snarky is usually dealt with by moderators. Unfortunately we are all human and make mistakes. Seeing and thinking about who we have lost as fellow banjo fans here might help keep things more civil. At least, that is my hope.

Yeah there are snarky people, those who always have to be right, get the last word in, be the "smartest" person in the room. Kind of childish, all based on unresolved inferiority complexes that drives them to be "superior" to feel good about themselves. Part of the human condition. Yep, ignore and move on. The sad part for me though is that some very knowledgeable people here on BHO let the snarkies drive them away. The snarkys aren't worth even being upset over, their opinions are usually just empty childish rantings. And did I say just ignore and move on.... banjered

Ignore them. Life is too short to argue with people about points that in the long run would make zero difference in one’s overall quality of life, or a positive impact on society as a whole.

Internet communication gets a lot easier when you adopt the habit of assuming everyone is smiling and laughing when they type their posts.

You've really gotta commit to the method for it to work.

quote:

---

Originally posted by KCJones

Internet communication gets a lot easier when you adopt the habit of assuming everyone is smiling and laughing when they type their posts.

You've really gotta commit to the method for it to work.

---

Some things should not be assumed.

Joe

Imagine you're at a flea market, walk up to a booth and see something you are interested in. You ask the seller if he is interested in a trade. He ignores you as if you were not standing in front of him. This is what the keyboard world has brought us. If someone with a listing (on any platform) is not interested in your inquiry, they just ignore you. Total lack of common courtesy.
There were a lot of good contributors here on the BHO 10-15 years ago but they were chased away by the few a holes that were here then and may still be here, I do not know as I have just ventured back here myself.
I sometimes struggle with keeping faith in humanity.

I think experience will tell a person who is to be relied upon and who make sense. You have to take the good with the bad and to discern betweenmisinformation and information. On the other hand every day I go on BHO which I do more than I should I see people posting who i considered world class experts on the banjo, important sellers and fixers and historians of the banjo. A few minutes ago, I just responded to a post from Greg Rich, much of it just thanking him for all of the contributions he has made to the banjo world for decades.

Yes there are uninformed people and people learning stuff here, but there seem to be a lot of people here who I recognize as informed experts on banjo playing, banjo design, banjo history, and other things.

I do presentations on banjo history every year at the banjo gathering, formerly known as the banjo collectors gathering. I usually do three class on old time music mostly banjo history, mostly banjo history for each of the online fiddle hells and in Massachusetts fiddle hells. I am currently producing for Document Records, the first in a series of CDs of Old Time music commercial recordings with Black musicians sold as white old time. I am currently working on a presentation for the banjo gathering in November.

Whenever I start a project like that, the first thing I do is go through Banjo Hangout and Fiddle Hangout and always find great information. I get intelligent answers to questions that I or experts I know do not know. I find people who have expertise in questions I do not know.

Yes, there are a few cranks, and several people who are just plain evil here. The moderators here tend to be judicious in dealing with inappropriate behavior, but the level of information here on the banjo is first class on both practical issues and historical questions.

I would like to give specially thanks to those generous souls who have serve as moderators here. Someone posting well on this thread in particularly is  a moderator who typifies this. They are not being paid and have to deal with idiocy, insanity, and damaged souls.   They do exceptionally well.   That kind of generosity inspires me not to be the old crank  I  can  be.  It makes me feel good that there are people around who do stuff like that so well. 
Thanks 

The civility here on the hangout has been won by the founder, the administrators,  and the moderaters  and most participatants being very clear about what is acceptable behavior and what is not, and by their taking action to suspend or permanently exclude people who cross a certain line.   

It is also won by the basic decency of most of the people here who genuinely love the banjo.

About 20 years ago when I was involved in organizing the Black banjo gathering I was able to personally thank Eric for creating this operation.   I didn't know the half of what good it represents then.  

Thanks to all of you for being here.

---

Originally posted by eagleisland

Exactly. That's the way it is on any online forum. Even here on the Hangout, which is a remarkably civil place for what it is, there are a few folks who, when I see their threads, I usually don't bother.

---

I play banjo for my own enjoyment, which is why I come to BHO.
If someone bothers me here or elsewhere online, I block them. I’m too old to be arguing online with people online. 
With that said, I do welcome respectful conversation where differences of opinion are discussed. I know I'm not perfect and am open to what other people have to say. Just be kind. 

How do you block a person on BHO? I never knew one could do such a thing which sounds pretty good, and i have been on BHO about 20 years!

quote:

---

Originally posted by cottontop

Not sure if this is the correct topic place in which to post this, but it just might fit. Anyway, I have been a member of several different forum genres; i.e., banjo playing, fly fishing, reel collecting, watch collecting, and a few others. On all of these forums it seems that there are always one or two "know it alls" who try to correct things that have been posted or try to show others that they know more about the subject at hand than the OP (or anyone else). These guys will often get down right snarky and sometimes even insulting. Arguing with them does no good as they will just get more firm in their opinions. After having gone round and round with a few I just now ignore them. They may think that I have just given up or that I feel that I have lost the argument (if the topic ever came to an argument) and if they do think this, then so be it.

Do you experienced posters just ignore the know it alls? I feel it is just not worth getting all upset over what is usually a trivial matter.
Joe

---

This is what the "Scroll" function is for.    Careful, though, tendonitis is a hazardous byproduct the way some online discussions go.