This is unbelievable set of events........just venting.
I've had bad days before but this on tops the list. Thursday May 18th received a phone call from a sister that my older sister passed away, on May 5th. She had a severe stroke 7 years ago. She lived with my brother n law in Wyoming. The brother law has diminish, hence the care takers. Shocked I called the brother n laws daughter who live in Illinois. She had said in a conversation in Jan. that if anything changes with them she'd get a hold of me. I call out there the first week of each month. Lately I was just getting care givers and they filled me in on every thing. Last time I got thru to them was first of March and the brother n law was in hospital.
She said it wasn't her responsibility to get a hold of me, not family. Then I was informed the brother n law passed away in March. She couldn't tell me what date that happened on. I did get a funeral home name from her. Called the funeral home was told they had buried my sister the morning of the 18th.
One of my sisters found the brother n laws funeral video. I couldn't find a thing on it. The reason they only used his initials for the video, not his name. There was no obituary for either. The video did show my sister in a wheelchair, last time I'd see her alive.
The brother n laws children (5) had not seen him 40 years, till 2 years ago they came into his life. They are all retired or close to it.
I'm in such a funk I don't sleep well. I just don't operate in a world like this. This is like a show on ID channel.
Wow, that's a harsh reality to have to cope with. My condolences on your sister's passing, and my sympathies to you on the way you were dealt with.
Sorry Rich to hear your loss. The fact that you care about your sister shows and that is what's important. The loss of communication was out of your control. Sounds like you did what you could.
We all have..famahly..
Not gonna say more..
C'ept...i am very sorry for the pain you have to endure..
I understand..
Can't imagine how bad you must feel.
But, there's a similar story from here.
Irene's nephew died in a car crash.
NOBODY bothered to notify her, since she was divorced from her previous husband, and, perhaps, in their minds, NO LONGER his aunt!
I found out because it was in the newspaper, and her previous husband, an immigrant from Latvia, had a very rare last name.
Similar, but on a lighter note. Last August we were at a jam about 3 hours north of here last. I was shooting the breeze with the guy who had pulled into the next site. He mentioned that he was from Bowsman, MB ... the same district that a couple of my cousins have lived/farmed in for many decades. I asked if perchance he knew my cousin Trevor, and mentioned that I hadn't seen Trevor for several years. He gave me a bit of an odd (?) look and informed me that Trevor had died in Nov. 2020. [Ah well, I guess ya win some, ya lose some, and some get rained out. I subsequently asked 4 of my brothers and it was news to all of them.]
I am dealing with similar “stuff” presently. So I understand much of what you have been dealing with. My advice,… be strong, take care of yourself, seek peace. Brad
I am realizing that people respond to situations differently. I was raised to respect people. I am sorry for all of us dealing with this kind of stuff. Time heals all wounds, but it leaves a mark on our souls.
I appreciate the responses; it is hard to put your thoughts into words.
Rich
Very sorry for your loss and all that goes along with it.
I'm afraid that as miles separate us, and the internet isolates us, this kind of thing will become a more common occurrence. It was only by my making a chance phone call to my aunt in California that I found out she was on her death bed. I flew out right away and she only said about 6 words to me in the few days I got to spend with her. I don't think her caretaker would have reached out to the family at all after she died if I did not make that one call. Of course, the caretaker was the only person mentioned in my aunt's will. Hmmm. . . . .
Funny, but I was thinking after I read and posted on this topic. I know more about, and care more about people I've never met here on the hangout than I know about my own family. I have cousins I haven't seen or heard from in decades, one passed away from Voldemort, and I only found that out because my sister happened to tell me some time after it happened. I strongly suspect I will lose more relatives that I was once in regular contact with and not know about it right away.
Sad.
My 91 year old mother in laws older sister just passed away Monday. She was from Germany and lived in Italy. We had never met her. A lawyer in Germany contacted us right away. My children are interested in keeping her apartment. It sounds like a long plane ride to a place where no one speaks English.
