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If you haven't seen these before...enjoy!

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May 14, 2022 - 1:21:35 AM
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New Zealand

11405 posts since 6/29/2003

Funny Quotes From Employee Evaluations.

Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.

Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.

His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.

I would not allow this employee to breed.

Works well when under constant supervision and cornered in a trap.

 When he opens his mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.

 He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.

This young lady has delusions of adequacy.

She sets low personal standards, then consistently fails to achieve them.

This employee should go far --- and the sooner he starts, the better.

This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.  Then he fell out of the family tree.

 A room temperature I.Q.  If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Got a full six-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.

A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.

A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.

If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.

Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; but he only gargles.

May 14, 2022 - 7:00:34 AM
Players Union Member

Texasbanjo (Moderator)


27175 posts since 8/3/2003

Thanks for the morning laughs.   I think I've met some of these employees when I was in the workforce. 

Edited by - Texasbanjo on 05/14/2022 08:14:44

May 14, 2022 - 8:27:27 AM

75972 posts since 5/9/2007

I'm so glad I spent my working life alone on the water or in the woods.

May 14, 2022 - 8:41:47 AM



10953 posts since 6/5/2011
Online Now

Is there a comparable list for managers/employers?  I've seen/worked for a couple of doozies*.

* = Thank you, Mr. Spear ... one of my high school chem. teachers.  When we'd solve (?) a "problem," he'd often note, with a "hint" of satisfaction/accomplishment: "That was a doozie!"

Edited by - Owen on 05/14/2022 08:46:34

May 14, 2022 - 8:52:11 AM
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Players Union Member



41553 posts since 3/7/2006

I thought it was from the mods' evaluation of BHO members (but with "employee" changed to "member".

May 15, 2022 - 9:45:21 PM

Paul R


15773 posts since 1/28/2010

I saw this list as student report card comments.

Good stuff!

May 16, 2022 - 12:24:07 AM

Bill Rogers (Moderator)


25908 posts since 6/25/2005

Comment from an acid-tongued teacher I knew to a student whom she knew wouldn’t get it: “You make a strong case for retroactive abortion.” Not a good idea, even 20-odd years ago, but no complaints were filed.

May 16, 2022 - 5:51:21 PM

1051 posts since 3/7/2006

I had a boss once who cherished the opportunity to tell me what a great job I just did - Now throw it away and try to do a keeper.

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